Day 3 of school! Zoe still loves it! And I love how much she loves it! In fact this morning about 5 minutes before the 7 am alarm went off she came into our room just crying and crying and I finally calmed her down enough to ask what was wrong and she said "It's Saturday and I can't go to school" and she was soo sad about that! What a blessing that was! It's never been this easy to wake her up in the mornings but since school started she's like a new girl in the mornings. If only I could say the same about Lexi! Zoe also told me this morning she wants to be a doctor because she likes to look at people's bones. Not sure where that came from, but I could encourage her today about doing really good in school so she can become a doctor one day. Doctor school costs a lot of money to which she replied "but I have two piggy banks", though please note, one of those is Lexi's she was claiming as her own. We'll see if she continues with this dream as she grows up.
It's been an incredible week, both good and bad and really emotionally draining. Zoe and I have transitioned to this new time in her life and are working on getting used to the new days and Lexi is trying to do so as well. We've been getting up early and going to bed early and somehow still adjusting well.
On Wednesday, my grandmother passed on, so on top of the emotionally draining week with Zoe in school I've now got these emotions going on. The funeral is Monday at 1. So, now come more decisions to make... do we take Zoe out of school for the funeral? Do we leave her and Lexi here with a sitter (and one to pick up Zoe from school)? I mean, they can handle sitting through a funeral but Zoe is soo excited about school and likes it so much. Plus, it's the Monday of the first real week of school so they start with the real school stuff not just the start up week stuff, ya know? I don't know... we'll see what we finally decide to do! So, pray for the family this week. It was expected and it truly is a blessing that she's passed on as she's been sick for quite a few years now, but still the void will be there no matter if she remembered people or not- they remembered her!
We made it! Ok, I made it! I managed to take my oldest daughter to school today and leave her there! yes, I shed a few (read A LOT) tears! We got up at 7, ok, I was up before that... too excited (read Nervous) to sleep! I woke up Zoe and gave her a present for her first day of school! An adorable flip flop bracelet like the one she lost a while back. I took the charm off and put it on a necklace for her since the bracelets were still a bit too big.
She got dressed in her adorable new school dress that we've had hanging up for about 2 months so she'd look forward to her first day of school and her cute new ballet flats we got on Friday.
We ate some breakfast- pancakes and sausage... gotta have the protein to make it till 11:50 lunch time. Then we even had time to brush her hair, put on a little lip gloss and daddy helped her put in her earrings for her big day!
We got ready to head out the door, with the backpack, the quick snapshot of Zoe and her stuff
and finally looked out the windows- it was raining... well so much for riding her bike and walking to school today- luckily there is always tomorrow. Of course we did have to park on the opposite side of her classroom door, so it was kinda like walking to school!
So, we hopped in the truck and got to school about 20 minutes early... we were excited! Ok, we stopped for a few photo ops... I mean come on this IS her first day of Kindergarten!
We went inside her class with her to help her put away her things and kiss her goodbye... enter the waterworks! Wow! I thought I could do it. I mean, I'm not a crier! At all! But today was too much... the teacher is great and I ask if we could leave her then b/c it was still a little early and she said "yes, before she sees mom all teary eyed" and then it happened- My first tear... so I hugged and kissed her quickly and turned to leave. This is when Lexi started to cry that she "wanted to stay with Zoe" and then I think I really started to lose it! So I picked up Lexi and we left. Thank goodness Patrick was with us to tell Zoe bye as me and Lexi both left crying! Zoe though was oblivious to it all! She was just happy as a clam to be there! So, here we left her! Here is where I pictured her at various times throughtout the day as I looked at the clock time and time again. I've never seen a day move soo slowly! Of course she did finally tell me later that though I pictured her here all day that shortly after class started the teacher moved her to the yellow table right next to this one! So, bummer! Maybe I'll get a picture of it sometime soon!
Finally 3:30 rolled around and there we were... waiting at the door to pick her up! Ok, we were about 20 minutes early again! The let us in and I went to her and.... She was a grump! Though honestly I think she was just overwhelmed and mentally exhausted! Heck I was too! So, I ask her how her day was and she said "I didn't know it'd be soo long"... Well, honey I didn't either! But after giving her some time to unwind she started talking about her wonderful day and didn't stop! What a talker! And the last thing she said tonight was "I can't wait to go back to school tomorrow! I love it I love it I love it!" No matter how hard I thought today was and how many tears I shed and prayers I sent up, this was more then I could ask for! My daughter loves school! She made friends and she loves her teacher! I have been thanking God ever since she said that! HE is soo good! Now, if we can just keep that opinion for the next 13 years we'll be good to go!
It's Sunday! I have two days till I walk my oldest daughter to the doors of a school and leave her in the hands of a complete stranger.... I'm nervous, excited, scared, amazed and so much more in love with her today then I thought would ever be possible the day I held her little 8lb 8 1/2 oz body all those short years ago. I remember then how many people said that time would fly and I remember thinking... how could something this small make the world move faster? But it has, at least it's made my world move faster and it's been such an incredible ride-!
So here I sit and think of all the things I should be doing and the list of questions I should be writing to ask her teacher, Mrs. Hayes, tomorrow at the sneak peak but instead here I sit thinking. I am thinking of how truly bittersweet this day will be. It's a great day, I mean a whole new chapter of her life is starting, the start of independence and learning and making new friends, but at the same time it's bitter for me as I won't be as much a part of it as I have been these past 5 1/2 years. I won't be there to kiss away scraped knees or hurt feelings or help her with her learning frustrations. Instead I'll play a different, more important role. I'll now be the truly prayerful parent. I'll be the one to lift her up daily- I'm sure the first day, hourly or more often, in prayer to the One who can be there to help her with the scraped knees, the hurt feelings and the learning frustrations. I've ask myself several times a day it seems if she's ready, when really what I'm asking is if I'm ready, ready to let go- even a little bit. I'm not sure if I am, but what I am sure of is weather or not the answer is yes, the time is now! So as we embark on this new journey, this new chapter I ask for prayers from my friends and family; prayers for peace for all of us. Prayers for me specifically that I know that I've done well as a parent, that she's prepared for school, that she'll be able to make friends without me there encouraging her to do so and then prayers for me as I embark on my journey as once again a parent of one- a two year old no less. So as Zoe learns to befriend her new classmates I'll be at home learning also, learning once again how to play dress up, pretend, to do puzzles and to color and to really learn to enjoy my second born who will also be losing her playmate and have to make do with me, who quite honestly isn't near as fun as Zoe has been for her. Thank you to all who read this and to all who have been there and can share your hope that this isn't a bittersweet day but truly a day of independence and joy! May I some day soon feel that!
We had a nice day last week finally. It was only about 85 degrees- in the shade, so I decided to take the girls out in the morning for some end of the summer pictures. This yet again was a reminder that I won't be able to do this with Zoe anymore once school starts. I'm Saddened by this but soo thankful for such great pictures to remember the time by. Here are my 3 favorites and I've done some photo shop work to add their names. Such fun! Have a happy Wednesday!
What a great day to enroll for school, ok, besides the fact that it is 103 degrees- in the shade! We got up early- 7 am, well 7:15, we ate breakfast-french toast/bacon sandwich, and we got out the bike and the stroller and we were out the door at 8! Yeah! This has been something we've been working on. It really does prove that God loves us, especially when he blessed me with children that are night owls and can sleep till 9 or later in the morning if I let them. Now, as much as I've enjoyed this for the past 5 years readjusting to the fact that this is no longer an option has been a struggle for us- all of us! So, we've been getting up at 7, ok, maybe it's been more like 7:30, but we've been working on it for the past couple of weeks all the same and slowly we are adjusting. Today since it was school enrollment that started at 8 I decided to make today a practice run. So, really we did it perfectly, though I must admit I felt like I was yelling all morning to get going.. we managed to even make it to the school after our 15 minute walk at 8:15. Of course school doesn't start till 8:30, so isn't it nice to have that window of extra time for those mornings when it just doesn't happen? I was thrilled with how well it went and now am hopeful that everyday will go as smoothly! Here is the outfit that Zoe chose to wear for today's enrollment day- What a great choice! You'd almost think she could read her shirt and that's why she picked it : )
Have a good day everyone! Don't forget to vote if you get to today also! What a blessing that we still have that right in America to voice our opinions! Take advantage of it! Here's a fun little picture to enjoy today as well! Love it!
My life is blessed! I've been married to the man of my dreams for 7 years though it feels like just yesterday! I love reading and taking pictures, but the best job I never imagined loving this much is staying at home with my two beautiful little girls!